Dear Dater,

So you’ve met Adam, hit the jackpot and made it past the first date (Streets are two-way Eve).  Scheduling has worked in your favour and the dates are adding up.  This is when I discovered my subconscious brain knows a lot more about my dating preferences than my conscious brain.  I call this ‘layers of compatibility’.

My subconscious brain knows I:

• don’t like houses cluttered with stuff – even though it makes my house look good
• don’t like Adams who list their possessions – as a representation of who they are
• don’t like Adams who have more interest in the name of his work colleague, I just ended a relationship with, than any other content of the date
• don’t like being talked at for hours
• do like a great sense of humour and the accompanying laughter
• do like a romantic and
• do include sex as an important ‘layer of compatibility'(Sexy Eve).

My conscious brain knew about the sense of humour and the accompanying laughter – and that’s about it.

Part of the reasons for this is my lack of exposure to many of these other elements.  The Adam with the house so full of stuff also had a garden so full of stuff that finding his front door was a challenge.  One of my friends thought that this should have been warning enough , and wondered why I went inside at all – but I guess I had other things on my mind.  I nearly didn’t meet the Adam who wanted to know his work colleague’s name – as he had the same name as my ex-partner and he worked in the same profession as an Adam I just ended a relationship with.  Regardless we met…. Once.

I do love sharing meals – and find Adams who guard their meals with vengeance – rather selfish.  I do love conversations on all sorts of topics – as long as Adam isn’t the only one contributing.  I do love intimacy – but that’s another story.

Have fun finding out about your ‘layers of compatibility’.

Surely Eve